I’m going to miss me…

A world in mourning

So I woke up this morning to find tons of hits on my website (www.marksloanmd.com), way more than I’ve had in many a moon. What in the world is up, I wondered. Did some big shot celebrity finally recommend Birth Day? Some book award left over from 2010? Did I win the lottery? (Tough to do without a ticket, but still…)

So I Googled references to my book, and searched Amazon to see if there’d been a sales “bump,” but no. Hmmm…a mystery.

Then I thought of my alter ego, Dr. Mark Sloan (aka “McSteamy) on Grey’s Anatomy, the source of many a snicker when I’m introduced at conferences and talks. (It got so bad a few years back that I’d start my talks with a photo of McSteamy and just wait for the laughter to die down.) Had something happened to him?

RIP: Me

Sure enough. When I Googled “McSteamy” there it was: hundreds of posts and tributes, and millions of grieving fans. Last night, right there in the middle of the season opener, they went and killed me…er, him, off.

Not sure how he died, as I haven’t seen the show in years, but from the tear-stained posts it apparently involves a smash-up, a coma, and a pre-crash wish not to remain on life support for more than 30 days. Or something. Whatever the case, they granted his wish, and a bit of me went with him when they pulled the plug.

An accurate portrayal

Please: no flowers, no sympathy cards. I’ll carry on somehow. I’ve been through this before, you know, back when they cancelled Diagnosis: Murder. Just when I thought the pain would never end, in walked McSteamy with his pecs and his bath towel. Who knows where Dr. Mark Sloan will pop up next?

I’m betting on a reality show: Who Wants to be the Next Dr. Mark Sloan? Maybe I’ll enter, though they might disqualify me on the grounds of a pre-existing condition: I’m already him.